I am not enough

OH my!!

As a new mother I was also a young wife (which most new mothers are) and thus I was learning so much in such a short time.

Or, at least I NEEDED to be learning. But I was not. I was barely surviving.

Looking back, I can see this. At the time I thought there was just something seriously wrong with me. I felt as though I was not a good enough person to be a mom. (um, who IS?) and I was not really prepared to be a wife (again, who is?).

Life is a learning process. An adventure in discovery.

And I have discovered that life is messy.

   Children can be annoying.

   Husbands can be frustrating.

   Friends can turn on you.

And this journey, this adventure we call living is not fair. 

But that's OK! If life were fair, we would all have to clean up our own mess (as nice as that sounds, then no one could give you a break!) 

and if life were fair, there would be no salvation.

and if life were fair, there would be no Helper, no Peace-giver for us to call Father.

So, I am not enough. This I have learned thoroughly! but He IS enough. His help is my potential. His peace is my strength.

Lean on the Savior, the One Who loves you more than any other. And, while your clothing will still not put itself away and the sink will still pile with dishes and your children will still squabble and need your attention... your heart [and home] will be full of peace [though not necessarily quiet or complete order]. Your life will be filled with the calm and strength and resolve that cannot come from your own will-power. 

Your world may fall apart daily, but you will not.

being part of:

the best way to love our children

I missed my scheduled posting time last week. But the children and I had great fun visiting my grandparents, whom I have not seen since my oldest child was a few months old! It was so wonderful for them to meet the other 3! It was a rather spur-of-the-moment trip, so I had time to schedule any posts.

my grandparents, my children & myself

I have long heard it proclaimed to men: "The best way to love your children is to love their mommy. and let them KNOW you love their mommy!" This obvious affection creates stability that children so desperately need. 

This idea is rooted in Biblical truths, but for today I am simply relating personal experience.

And I am going to tip the tables and say it backwards: "The best way for ME [mommy] to love my children is to love their daddy. and let them KNOW it!" 

I must be INTENTIONAL about my love for him. 

I have come to notice that the more I devote my time, attention and even Bible study & prayer to simply loving my husband in the way he feels love [his love language], the nicer I am to my children when they are whiny and the more joy comes to me when doing the mundane--laundry, dishes, etc. 

Happy Mommy = Happy home. 

So, my goal is to commit my mind to pleasing my children's father; and whether or not the clothing actually gets put away, our home will be a happier place! [but I'm working on getting the laundry put away!!]

I pray these thoughts are encouraging to someone today! 

being part of:

being MY husband's wife

There are so many posts out there that talk about being a wife the way God intended. There are a few posts about that on this blog. 

But today I am going to tell you a few things I have personally learned about being the wife my husband praises {wow! that sounds boastful, but his praises are how I know I have done something right! so I am going to share what that has been recently}. 
**And just because my husband has noticed these things does NOT mean I can give them up as "accomplished"! I still struggle with these -and so much more- every. single. day.**

 

1. being intentionally "beautiful" for him. dressing more for his eyes. {I know that might sound like I think I'm pretty, but really, I just mean that what he enjoys about my wardrobe has become more of my focus when I dress & shop}

When I keep my hubby's likes in the forefront of my thoughts when dressing for the day, I find there are a few items of clothing that really need to go! And when I allow it to influence what I buy, I feel better about spending a few dollars on my wardrobe. I also find that I feel more feminine knowing that there is a man out there that appreciates the way I look {smiles}. 

**Have you ever asked your husband what clothing he likes on you? or just taken note of his expressive reaction to your outfit?

2. making our supper daily. and usually it is edible. {smiles}

I try to make note of the meals he eats quickly and those he gives me some "direction" on... and take the direction as a gentle reminder that I am not the only one eating the food I prepare! While I do try to make our food as nutritionally healthy as possible, sometimes I just try to make something I know he thinks is YUMMY! because HE is my #1! 

**Do you let your husband occasionally criticize your food with an open mind {and heart!}? It's not easy sometimes, but it can show him your love.

3. allowing God to work in my heart. {if he can notice it, it must not be my imagination that God is working. and He has shown me some ugly things about myself recently}

When I ask and then allow God to show me that ugliness called SELF in my heart and then also allow Him to work a change in my life, it makes me a more pleasant person {just trust me on that if you have never experienced it}. And living with a woman who has a pleasant disposition is at least part of EVERY man's dream! {smiles} Yes, it IS hard sometimes. It is painful to know... sometimes agonizing to admit... that I am wrong. that things I have thought and acted on were just not right. not Godly. not Christlike.
But when I have allowed God to work and I have humbly told my husband that I know this or that was wrong and will you please forgive me, there is such a freedom that comes. And usually he turns right around and tells me that he realizes it was not all my fault.

** When you have conflict with your husband, do you ever honestly asked God to reveal your own fault in the situation? and then talked humbly and openly with your husband about it?

I pray these thoughts are encouraging to someone today! 

being part of: