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Monday, August 6, 2012

thoughts on singleness

I had a conversation recently with an unmarried lady friend. She has a growing ministry with small children and visions for that ministry to thrive! I appreciate her zeal, and her love for God is evident.

Yet, she told me that she receives comments regularly from people about her unmarried status. I assume these are well-meaning people, as they seem to think the singleness she finds herself in somehow prohibits her from having a full, vibrant life and ministry.

Let me tell you, my unmarried friend, your life can be as full as you let it be - whether you are married or not! [I have knowledge of more than my share of people who are married yet have neither a full life nor a vibrant ministry for God!]

Singleness lends itself to a bit of freedom that those married, especially with children, do not have. I married right out of college. I do not have experience of the trials or temptations that come with serving the Lord as an adult while still single, but I have witnessed those who do it right as well as those who do it wrong.
In light of that, all ministries are simply an opportunity to serve God. And when we allow Him, He puts us in place to have certain ministries. No where does He tell us that ministry is only for married people. Actually, Paul was given liberty to tell us that if you are content to be single, then that can actually give you opportunities that would otherwise be a closed door [I Corinthians 7:1-9].

Serving God is a command to all Christians: single, married, divorced,  child or adult. [Matthew 20:26-28; 28:19-21; Mark 16:15-16; I Timothy 4 {especially verse 6 and 10-12} and many more].  Telling someone their ministry cannot be full for whatever reason {unless pointing out an error in love: Ephesians 5:6-11} is not helpful or Christ-honoring.

As married ladies and mothers, we should pray for those in singleness-that they would be content in Christ. Pray that the Lord would protect them from temptations or "evil" appearances. We should befriend them, on a personal level, so they realize and understand our genuine concern for them as people! When we see evidence of genuine service to God and growth in His word, we should even point them out {but NOT elevate} to our children as an adult to trust and point out areas of their life that they should emulate {such as a humble, teachable spirit or a willing, helpful attitude} and show our children that life is not all about growing up and having a family. Life is all about learning how to SERVE JESUS!

And to my single friends, remember that you are part of the body that is the bride of Christ! You have his love to comfort and protect. You have His peace to be your companion and guide. You have His wisdom to direct your steps and His tender mercies to correct you when needed. [There are MANY Psalms as well as other passages that speak of God's comfort and protection and peace and guidance and tender mercies! These for for ALL Christians, not just married people.] Never let anyone's personal opinions on your marital status allow you to believe that anything you are doing for God is somehow less valuable than what us married folks are doing!
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{While I am a married lady and my main reason for starting this blog was to encourage other married ladies, I would not say that this blog is only for married ladies. While many of my posts have examples from married life or from being a mother, the premise for Becoming God's Gift is not just for married ladies!! We were all created and designed to work together towards reaching others for Christ. While my personal goal is to become the wife and mother God wants me to be, I also want to learn to be the friend God desires me to be too!}

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